sometimes when you think you are ok with stuff, something else crops up... why is that??

I am really beginning to think... I cannot live with my brother, right now I am really hoping SC pans out and we get word this week and I will know my time with him might be just a couple of weeks... like the world he is in financial straights... can't afford insurance so he cant afford his meds and I can't handle him when he is not taking his medication... I love him, he is my brother but there was a good year or two we literally did not speak because he wasn't taking his meds... it upsets me when he talks suicide... with his bipolar issues I am afraid he might just do something stupid... I had a close friend end his life that way... it still to this day, saddens me, leaves me with so many unanswered questions... I came across pictures of Jay the other day... and tears just started to flow... and still after all these years I am left to wonder... what was that bad???  and if you had 5 more seconds would you have done something different??

if it works out.. might stay with Amanda for a week or so till SC is a definite and we have a date for that move.. her hubby will be out of town on business for about 15 days so it might work out perfectly....

Had a dental thing today... might as well get all the work taken care of that I can before I no longer have insurance myself... 

had to miss my session with Kurt... that cost me $325, not missing my session with Kurt but.. my car had to get new rear rotors and brakes and I would not have had it repaired in time to do our workout and get back before shop closed...

and oh yeah... I need to spend another $500 or so on 4 tires mounted and balances... the guy said I should not even attempt to drive to Florida on two of my tires... well I am just gonna have to hope God is looking out for me because I do not have another $500 to spend, period...   when it rains it pours

but I went to my mail box and DID have a nice card with words of love from my honey...