just when the caterpillar thought that life was over,
it became

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

How do you know???

How do you know when its the "voice of God" or just your own voice in your head???

How do you know when its the "will of God" and not just your own will???

First, please don't anyone take this as OH MY GOSH she is going to hell in a hand basket... a lot of this is new to me, learning to let go, to trust (yes even trust God sorry if that offends you)...

I mean listen I did not come out of my mothers womb with 14" biceps and able to curl a 30 pound dumbbell, I had to WORK toward that, same with being able to bench press upwards of 100+ pounds... But for me that is a physical thing that is tangible something I can see, I can feel, I can touch....I can understand how lifting weights works... because its a tangible thing for me..

And maybe for some of you... God is a 'tangible' thing... God has always been a part of my life... only, and sadly, not the most important part of my life.  Not because He didn't or doesn't deserve that spot, but because it was not practiced in my home as a child and, well, you don't know what your not taught.  I can't expect my soon to be step son to magically understand 12 x 12 if we (Matt and I) and school does not teach him that concept. 

As a small child my only dealings with God were when my mother wanted to pawn us off on a Sunday so she could sleep in, or sleep with whoever was in her life for that week.  The Baptist church bus came around about 7 or 8am... and we never returned home till after lunch time... yes she got free babysitting from God and the church members... Or as a teen my best friend at the time... her mom was very religious (not in a throw God in your face type of way) and when I stayed the night on Saturday we attended church on Sunday... Secretly I loved it because I FELT like part of a real family... and in some way, in my head no one elses, that was a bad thing... because it caused me to think as I got older, out of place in church... WHY?? well because EYE, by myself alone, was not part of a family... so I got this odd notion in my head that church was for families...

Then, well, I grew up, ok older maybe, and fell into the wrong crowds... drinking, drugs, random sex... I am not proud of what I did but nor am I ashamed of what I did...I'd like to change some things but I am not afforded that opportunity to change my past, only, my future, and not repeat those mistakes... rather learn from them... and I like to think I've learned a lot from this period in my life - but needless to say... mmm... God was not at the forefront of my life in this era of my being either - however I know He was definitely looking out for me because heaven knows I should have been dead, with all the crap I was doing and the people I was hanging out with...So this makes me wonder, now, in this era of my life... just what does God have in store for me???

So now here I am...44... and honestly what I consider a BABY CHRISTIAN... I am that 7 yr old still learning new concepts, but in a 44 yr old body and I am completely and totally and utterly confused and when you ask some 'seasoned' Christians about it, they look at you like your an idiot... YES I know shocking right... when the very thing God would expect them to do is nurture you, they look at you with that "OMG you don't know that, you don't understand that" look. 

Believe me people I wish so many times I would have been one of those kids that bucked the trends and embraced God when I was younger and they teach you about God in a kids body with a kids mind and you grow up in it and in Him and then BAM your 44 and you've been following God for decades and while you are not perfect (as none of us are) you understand what God wants of you...

So again... I am lead back to my baby Christian questions....

How do you discern between the 'voice of God' and your own voice?

How do you discern between 'God's will for your life' and your own???


WADDLER26.2 said...

Great question, Kim.

Tattoos and Teething Rings said...

I was raised in a house where we learned about God, but not in very specific terms; my mom was raised Jewish but became a Christian in the 70's (before she married and had kids), my dad is Irish and Catholic. Now that I'm an adult I'm still figuring out what it means to walk with God, and I don't think anyone should give you a hard time about your learning process. I think that when God talks to you, you just know, it's the voice in your heart that steers you. Sorry if that sounds like a Hallmark card :)

Christina said...

Hi Kim

I grew up Catholic but am now an atheist. So I really don't have an answer for you. But let's prove to everyone that religious and nonreligious folks can get along just splendidly, shall we? ;)

What was the turning point in your life? Was there an event that made you seek out god?

He & Me + 3 said...

That is an awesome question and my answer after growing up in the church all my life would be that God & the Holy spirit speak to us in still small voices. If you think you are hearing from the Lord then it will not go against the Bible in anyway. Sometimes you get a feeling in your gut...you know a peace or maybe something is unsettled. That is one way the HS speaks to me to confirm what I am already thinking or questioning. God can also speak in so many ways... but He has never spoken to me audibly..
I hope this helps my friend. What He is speaking to you or your spirit must first and foremost match up with his word. He would never ask you to do something that would contradict the Bible.

Diane said...

I think your post was beautiful and totally honest and out there. The best way to hear from God is to read the Bible. At just the right time you will be reading something, maybe you've seen a bunch of times, but it will take on a new meaning for you where you are. I attend book studies too, where a "God book" is selected and every week we discuss a chapter or watch a video that relates to the book. For me, praying is another great way to talk and pause and hear from God. I will start praying about one thing which leads to another and all of a sudden I am literally crying for a certain situation that I had not previously thought about. That is like praying God's heart out loud. I hope these suggestions help and do not ever feel belittled that you are a "baby" Christian in anyone else's eyes. WE ALL have our shortcomings and need to push pride down each and every day of comparing. Only compare yourself to Jesus. He already knows our failures but his grace is new every minute we need it. hugs to you and I hope you find some compassionate fellow Christians to share with. :O)

Anonymous said...

Okay - you know I can e-mail you directly, but I'll post this one to the blog.

You know the voice of God because it's something that didn't come out of your own head. And it is a very loving situation, usually not something you expected.

The combination of "loving" and "not out of your own head" is the clue.


Anonymous said...

Kim, this is the clue - you listen for things that don't come from your own head, and are loving.

You know I could e-mail this to you, but I'm posting it instead - you decide if it's worth others seeing.

God TELLS you things you don't already know - and doesn't tell you things in a way that makes you feel bad (although at times it will make you uncomfortable.)


On Purpose said...

Kim...thank you so much for visiting the blog...its such a blessing and treat for me to meet people! I am so excited about your question left in the comments today!!

so how do YOU know your hearing God's voice and not just your own thoughts in your head???

This is something we all deal with! Please know first of all that just now I prayed for you...and know that God will lead you through this. Its a promise from Him...when you seek Him and His will for your life...you will find it!

"Here's what I'm saying:
Ask and you'll get;
Seek and you'll find;
Knock and the door will open.

"Don't bargain with God. Be direct. Ask for what you need. This is not a cat-and-mouse, hide-and-seek game we're in. If your little boy asks for a serving of fish, do you scare him with a live snake on his plate? If your little girl asks for an egg, do you trick her with a spider? As bad as you are, you wouldn't think of such a thing-you're at least decent to your own children. And don't you think the Father who conceived you in love will give the Holy Spirit when you ask him?" Luke 11:9-13 The Message

Kim, I know when you seek to know God, hear from Him, He will be found and heard. Continue to communicate with Him! Read His word...take in all that is around you. When it all lines up, it will lead you to Him...His word, the Truth, will be found!

I will continue to keep you in my thoughts and prayers!

Feel free to keep me updated...if you want!

On Purpose,

alicia said...

I can completley relate to this question... and I was raised in a Christian home and school. I struggle daily to put Him first, and I always wonder if its my thoughts and if its HIS voice. Once in awhile, things just happen too perfectly though and I have to say "oh, so that is you God" I usually just ask that He makes himself blatantly clear to me, like smack me over the head please!!

Thanks for stopping by my blog! And I am glad you got your hands on Crazy Love, for 5 bucks none the less! That's awesome!!

Diane said...

Kim, BTW if you enjoy reading, maybe I can find you some good books I can send you. If you are interested, let me know. Hugs! :O)

Bina said...

I never saw this post...so I am answering late :)

To know who is doing the talking...look at where the voice is leading. Is it leading towards His Word...is it Truth, as found in the Bible? Does it convict without placing heaping mounds of shame? Does it uplift you even while keeping you humble?

OR...does it pull you counter to His Word? Does it leave you humiliated and low? Does it flash the allure of what you coulda, shoulda, woulda done/had/been?

God's voice will always be honest and consistant with His Word. If what you hear is not...it is not His voice.

Hope that helps some...
Much love today,

Anonymous said...

Read God's Word....the BIBLE.......It's the only road map (love letter from God) for your life that you need......study and meditate on the WORD.
Go to a BIBLE believing, BIBLE preaching church where you have to open up the BIble and dig into it as it's being taught or preached. Go to church every time the doors are open there for service or classes. Being a Christian is a way of life.....a choice.....to seek the Lord and hear his voice. Study the word everyday and ask God to speak to your heart as you read it.
He will reveal Himself to you if you invite Him into every part of your life. You should find that every time you hear the Bible or read it, you will feel love, hope, peace, joy, and yes even conviction to turn from the "sin" that is in your life. The Lord wants to shape and mold you into a vessel of honor for Him to lead others to Him. He wants you to tell all those that you may "body build"or compete with about Him. He's a perfect gentlemen who will visit your life if you invite Him into it everyday to guide and direct you.
Listen to Christian music.....It's important to fill your mind with the wonders of Him as much as you can. This world will distract you away from Him very easily.
I have not always served the Lord. I would not ever want to go back to living a day without Him. I pray that you will seek Him with all of your heart.....