Second Interview

The 2nd interview went well... at least I think so...

I was told I was 1 of 3 that made it to a 2nd interview... He said with your personality and experience I can see why Trish recommended you for a 2nd interview.  He said I had everything they were looking for and his only concern was they could not pay me any where near what I was making in IL. (honestly it will be less than 1/2 of what I was making... but since I'm not working now its 100% more than I AM making now :o)

"you won't get rich" was his comment "and if this is your sole source of income for your family..."

I assured him the money wasn't an issue and while I was not likely to get rich monetarily, the richness I would/could gain spiritually, priceless!  Now I will say no benefits like insurance scare the heck out of me... I cannot afford my previous employers COBRA at $700 a month (and trust me I know insurance and know damn well it does NOT cost them that much to even keep me via COBRA) so currently I am insurance-less...THAT is frightening...

He said they would be making a decision by the end of the week and I should hear something by then. I shook his hand, thanked him for his time, and said may the Lord guide you in your decision making process to find the right person.

I will admit that I did swallow hard, at first, when he mentioned the pay... I'd be lying if I said I didn't...

but then, WHY is that?  WHY... because when I dig deep and think about it... I've, in some fashion, defined myself by the money I make and I've never considered taking a job where the pay was ever less... for some reason, to me, that almost seemed like... well like some sort of failure on my part???? 

I know it makes no sense... the amount of money you make does not make you a success or not, it really doesn't... but when reflecting on this yesterday I had to dig deep and be completely honest with myself... believe me GOD... well He already knew the answer as to why this was hard for me to accept. 

But just because you make $30K, $40K, or even $400K that does NOT make you successful, its WHO you ARE not what you make.. how you treat others, what you do, how you act, etc... that is what makes one a success....

And honestly.. what has making more money gotten me???? well digging deep again, because God already knows the answer... its gotten me farther into debt that's where... so far that sometimes I wonder if my credit report and bank statements will ever see the light of black and not red.

Perhaps this is in some fashion God's way of humbling me a bit?  Bringing me to my financial senses??

Its about damn time I get myself out of this mess I have created... once and for all and stop being a slave to a flipping salary, only to piss it away and waste it.  God has provided me the smarts and opportunity to earn a decent salary and I've not been a very good steward of that money for Him.